cravating | (no subject)

[ He can see the panic in Nate's eyes. He never used to seem so easily on edge, and he expects that's his fault, after everything. He steps forward, reaching a hand up and setting it against Nate's arm. ]

Nate just... [ he sighs ] Go in. Go back to your boyfriend. He's worried about you. He doesn't need to know I was here, okay? Just... text me, let me know you're okay. But I shouldn't be here.

Please don't do this, Matt. I don't... I don't know if I can manage this without you, alright?

[Knowing Matt's waiting would help him stay on topic, not let Simon get him chatting too much, not allow him to get too emotional.]

Don't run away from this, from me. I just need to talk to him. Please.

I'm not... Nate, I promise I'm not. But it's not right, is it. It's not you, off dumping someone while the other one waits outside.

[ His hand grips his arm a little tighter, and his eyes seek out his gaze. ]

Look at me, okay. I'm not running. I'm just trying to help. If he finds out I'm here, then things will get nasty. You know they will.

He won't find out. I won't say anything, just-- [Oh god he can't stop himself from getting a little worked up, voice cracking as a few tears slip free. It all mingles with the rain. And unfortunately, he's not really keeping his voice down, is he?

In the distance, there's the sound of a car door closing and soft footsteps jogging across the street.

"Nate! I really think we should-- What's he doing here?" Simon wasn't the type to jump to anger, but he's definitely not pleased to see Matt there. He mostly looks confused as hell, though.]

[ It's proof enough there, Nate isn't a liar, he isn't the sort to hide things, and there he is already doing it. And oh fuck he's crying. Matt would do anything to stop that. He's about to say something when Simon appears, and he looks over Nate's shoulder at him.

Oh shit.

He tries not to bristle at the fact he calls him Nate. That's his name for him. The guy who introduced himself as Nathaniel, shortened it to Nathan, and reminded him that 'Nate' isn't his name the first few times. It's his name, so why is this prick using it? Okay Matt, not the time or place, and don't get angry over something like that. He tries to remind himself, stay calm, don't get angry. ]

Look he just wanted to show me his paintings.

[Simon looks doubly confused by that, but it doesn't even cross his mind that anything would be going on between them. He knows what Matt did, but not why. Not the whole story, anyway. He just knows that Matt has a temper and should probably be in prison after what he did. Giving him a cautious look, he focuses his attention on Nate, who is already shaking his head.]

I said we could talk tomorrow, Simon. I can't do this right now.

["Sweetheart, please...what did I do? Is it because I missed the show? Babe, you know I wanted to be there. I just couldn't." He feels awkward as hell having this conversation with Matt right here but he's going to have it no matter who's around, basically.]

It's not-! It's not that... I mean, maybe it partly is. I don't know. It's nothing you did, no one thing anyway. I just... I can't do this.

[He casts a quick look to Matt, as if trying to make sure that he's still there, that he hasn't gone.]

[ Oh well, he finds he likes it even less hearing him call him sweetheart and babe. It makes him grit his teeth, pushing away the anger. ]

Nate go inside. Have this conversation there. Look at the bloke, come on, this isn't what you want to do.

[ Whether he sounds reasonable or not, Simon doesn't want to hear it, and so he gives a rather stern glare in his direction. "We don't need your input, thank you. Now leave before I phone the police."

Matt scoffs. ]

For what? Standing in a street?

I'm not having this conversation at all tonight. [Nate snaps, not at either of them really. Or maybe at both. He hates this, hates confrontation. This was what he was trying to avoid.

Simon takes a step back and gives Matt a glare, "Well, now look what you've done."]

Oh yeah what I've done. Because I'm the one that came here after he was told to fuck off, right?

[ Well. In a way, yes. He distinctly remembers some strong words from Simon after he and Nate got back in touch again. He doubts Nate even knows about that visit. ]

Look, don't push me or I'll--

[ "Or you'll what, Matt? What will you do? Do you hear that? Threats already. "Will you put me in hospital this time, or do you have your sights on him again?" ]

[Nate finds its harder to draw a breath in now, his chest feeling right as panic sets in. This isn't how this was supposed to go.]

Simon. [He says with as much force as he can muster.] You need to go. I'll ring you tomorrow and we can talk then. I just...can't do this tonight.

"I'm not leaving you alone with him, Nathan. He's dangerous."]

He's not. [His eyes flick over to Matt.] You're not. [He thinks he might want the reassurance.]

[ "You just need a break. You've been pushing yourself too hard trying to get this show together. Come inside, come on, let me make you some tea. We can go away, just the two of us, use those air miles, go anywhere you like. As soon as this big case is over. Just away from him. Nate look at you, look what he's doing to you, sweetheart you're shaking." Simon tries to implore him, while all the while looking over towards Matt as though he's about to explode.

Matt stands there, feeling like he should be just about anywhere else. He hears Nate's reassurance, but he hears Simon's words too, and maybe he's right. Nate's worked up, and this big mess is all because he came back. ]

Nate listen. I'm going to go so your posh boyfriend doesn't call the police for breach of the pavement or something.

[He can't do this. He can't stand there and argue with the both of them about what he really wants.]

Please don't do this... [He pleads with Matt, trying to say everything that he can't with those words. Don't go. Don't run.]

[ Matt looks at Nate. Oh those giant fucking eyes of his, it's not fair is it, being able to look at him like that. It'd put any puppy to shame. So he huffs out, and flings an arm. ]

Look, he wants me to stay.

[ "What have you done? What have you said to him? He's probably scared of you! That you'll hurt him if you don't do as he says." Simon's opinion of Matt is about as low as they can get, and Matt shakes his head and lets out an angry laugh before muttering.. ]

Oh I'm going to fucking swing for you.

Matthew. [Nate says quickly. He doesn't call him that often but when he does, he means business.

Simon just nods and waves a hand. "Exactly! You know how he gets, Nathan. You know what he's capable of!"]

Simon, you know I care about you, but I've asked you to leave. Please just respect that. This isn't some case you can win. I just need some time.

[That seems to maybe get through to him, causing Simon to take a step back. "Babe, I wasn't..." Except he sort of was, wasn't he? "Tomorrow, then? Lunch? That place you like by my office?"

Nate just nods, silent and doing his best to keep himself together. Simon nods again and gives Matt an unforgiving look, still blaming him for this, but not trying to argue with Nate further, afraid that he's just digging himself a grave by doing it.

"I love you." Simon adds, voice trembling a little. "You know that, don't you? Course you do. So...tomorrow, then. Yeah, tomorrow." With that, he slowly backs up and turns to get back to his car, climbing in and driving off.]

[ The full-naming makes Matt almost jump, and he looks to Nate with a serious stare. He knows why he did it, and he's right. He needs pulling back, snapping out of it, and he knows when Nate is pulling no punches in what he means.

Matt takes a breath, closing his eyes and trying not to get even more angry as Simon goes on about what he's capable of. When he opens his eyes, it's to give a heated glare towards Simon, bristling around the edges as he watches him finally back away, trying not to feel sick when he hears him tell him he loves him.

He doesn't say anything at all until the car is out of sight. ]

He loves you. Do you hear that, he loves you. I should go.

[Nate watches Simon drive off and breathes a sigh of relief, glad that the worst of the fighting is surely over. But then Matt is talking and saying just the opposite of what he wants to hear.]

Don't you dare.

[Emotion shakes each word. He just fought for this. He's not giving it up so easily.]

[ Okay He sighs, giving in because he doesn't want to see him like this. ]

But he was right. Look at you, you're on edge, you're almost shaking. Look who did that. And he was right about everything else too. I should be kept away from you.

I'm just cold. [Its a poor lie and he knows it.]

Can we just get inside, please?

[ That earns one hell of a look. Like come on, he knows you better than that, Nate. ]

Okay. Okay come on. I'll make us a cuppa or something. But none of that fancy herbal shit.

[Nodding, Nate leads them across the street and inside the building. There's no lift, so they have to walk up the three flights to get to his door. The place doesn't look like much. It's small and cluttered, full of art supplies and canvases that are waiting to be shown. Nate's very tidy, though, so everything has a place. He still has the same sofa from when they lived together, same lamp on the side table. There's enough of their old life together to be comfortably familiar.

Immediately, Nate sheds his coat and slips off his soaked shoes. He doesn't bother explaining where things are in the kitchen because it's all in the same place as it was at their old place.]

I'll go fetch us some dry clothes. [For all their talk about getting naked, he's not so sure if Matt even wants that now. But he's here and that's what matters.]

Edited 2015-11-17 15:46 (UTC)

[ Inside it's strange. It's really him. Like a piece of him that he can recognise, art magazines on the side table. The couch, their couch. He's had sex on that couch. The coffee table has a replacement leg he made himself after Dave sat on it that Christmas. It's like a memory he can reach out and touch.

A little awkwardly, he moves and heads to where he guesses the kitchen would be. He shoves the kettle on and looks for the mugs (in the cupboard over the sink) and the tea bags (in the caddy by the kettle). All the same.

It's oddly comforting, like home. Difference is it isn't, and it's strange to be here. Part of him feels like an alarm is about to go off just for him being there. He grabs one of the kitchen towels and dries his hair off a bit while he waits for the kettle. ]

[Nate's gone for a bit, slipped into his bedroom to get clothes for the both of them, presumably. But it doesn't take that long to get clothes, does it? So maybe it's strange when he doesn't come back out after a bit.]

[ Matt has time to make the tea and drip a small puddle of water from his jeans onto the floor by the time he starts to worry where Nate might have gone. Did he change his mind? Should he just slip out, he'd get it if he wanted that. Still though, only one way he can find out, and so he steps around into the corridor and a door he assumes is to his bedroom, tapping it lightly before pushing it lightly open. ]

Nate? You in here?

[The room is fairly dark, the only light coming from a small lamp on the opposite side of the room. Nate's there with his back to the door. His bare back. His bare...well, everything. Turning as Matt enters, the light from his phone is easy to see, a text message open.]

Sorry, just- he won't stop... [He's still emotional and got swept up in texting back while he was trying to change. So now he's just standing there naked.]

[ Oh he's nude. Okay, that's cool, that's cool. It's not like he's never that before. Though he isn't entirely sure how he's supposed to look at him. He... fancies him and that's weird, he's not sure how to balance that thought. Should he check him out? No that's weird too. But none of that matters right now, the overriding issue being that he's not in the best place. So naked or not, Matt pays no attention, and just looks to the phone and knots his brows. ]

What's he saying?